Scratch that Witch!

And now, our look at Sabrina the Teen-Age Witch concludes.

 Trust me, I've heard worse solutions to the "I need dates" problem....

 Why do witches even need a car? They have brooms!

 Oh please! Like you need a love charm to attract cats. A dead fish will have the same effect!

 Just like a woman to make a man do all the work, amiright fellas? (Ladies, all hate mail yadda yadda....)

 ... I initially misread Sabrina's shirt as "Boob Power".

 Why is she holding Ron Jeremy's pants?

 A truly inspiring cover about inclusiveness and difference. Which is why Archie Comics waited until 2010 to introduce a gay character.

Remember, in the Archie Universe, the only way to get thin people and overweight people to mingle is via the dark arts.